A well known facet of my personality, especially to those that know me well, is my zero-tolerance policy where stupidity is concerned. I despise stupidity in all forms – it makes me very angry.
But of all of the adoption related stupidity that make my blood tip past the boiling point, mutual consent registries for adoption reunions are very close to the top of the list.
For the uninitiated, mutual consent registries (also known as passive reunion registries), are a ruse used by the anti-open records crowd; since such registries exist, they can say that they aren’t opposed to contact between the members of the adoption triad, while knowing full well the massive flaws in mutual consent registries, which are numerous.
There are huge problems with these passive / “mutual consent” registries.
First, what happens if my original mother is dead? A mutual consent registry means that, once she’s dead, even if she wanted contact and a relationship with her relinquished child, there is no remaining legal means by which I can learn about her past, or track down other family members, for that matter.
Beyond this is the secrecy behind the existence of such registries. I was shocked to learn that my home state even offered one! Surely after 10 phone calls and multiple letters, somebody might have thought to bring it up; instead, I only learned of it quite by accident. This is what makes it a ruse on the part of the anti-openness opponents. They know full well that they are providing a means of contact that is so poorly publicized that it will positively minimize any chance of success in making contact.
You see, the whole idea of preventing communication between the original mother and the adult adoptee sounds reasonable. right? The reality however is that no other American adults are treated this way, and by singling out the Bastards, we are marked by our government as second-class citizens entitled to fewer rights.
